Adventures in being a mommy

So the king and I walk into the deli. I'm itching to for my dollar and dream to win big, he's itching to help make use of these Dental benefits. So I'm ready to check out, the king is breakdancing down the aisles. (sn it's sad that the statement is not weird in the least bit) so I call out to him, he's ignoring me : per usual. I move closer to the counter and at the corner of my eye I can see my munchkin walking up behind me so I reach my hand back to grab his chips and say come in Munchkin. Now that would be okay if two things were not my reality at the moment. 1st the smaller person was not my son. No not in the least but. It was a Small person. So not only am I reaching out to this small person, I just called this small person who is may I add standing in line with a 40, a Munchkin. Cue the lollipop guild. Mortified was I. So now I'm trying to speed things up. The man behind the counter messed up my numbers. I didn't even correct him. I try to say to the small person I was talking to my son but of course the King is dougie'ing down the aisles so it's not readily apparent that he's with me. So finally I pull my son out the store. As you can guess he says but but but mommy He's Short.